Adapting to 40 – Not Quite Out Of The Game Yet!

I have had 6 whole days to get used to the fact I am now 40 years old.  This time last week I was a young 39yr old, full of vim and vigour.  But those days are gone now, and I even have the slippers to prove it.

To be honest, I was dreading turning 40.  There really didn’t appear to be anything good or joyful about the whole ordeal as I contemplated it in the days and weeks leading up to it.  But I was wrong.  I had two of the best evenings I have had all year last weekend.

On Friday evening, the day of my birthday, I traveled up to Bristol with a young lady friend to see the awesome brilliance that is Rufus Wainwright in concert.  Having seen him live once or twice before, I was expecting a good show, but Rufus managed to surpass all of my expectations.  Not one person left that concert hall who was not grinning from ear to ear.  The concert opened with an a capella rendition of Candles, the closing song from the new album ‘Out Of The Game’.   The album version of Candles is not one of my favourite songs, but the version he performed on his own in Bristol was stunning.  Here is a video of him performing said song in London earlier in the year.  I have found myself singing this all week!

Other highlights of the night included fabulous versions of ‘Out Of The Game’, ‘Cigarettes and Chocolate Milk’, ‘One Man Guy’, ‘The Art Teacher’, ’14th Street’, ‘Going To A Town’, ‘Montauk’, ‘The One You Love’ and a truly memorable cover of Leonard Cohen’s ‘Everybody Knows’.  The end of the concert was also pretty wild and bizarre, with Rufus dressed in a toga, a stage invasion, and a giant panini singing ‘Gay Messiah’.  It had to be seen to be believed!  In fact, you can see it right here –

It does give me pause for thought that one of the campest guys in the music industry is singing the current soundtrack to my life, but them is the breaks.  I have had a pretty shitty year up til now – I won’t recap on my year of heartbreak and dodgy health – but it was hugely reassuring to find that I can listen to Rufus and still smile.  All is not lost, not by any means.  I had worried that listening to Rufus would be too painful, but the exact opposite was true.  It was glorious.  Thanks for the tickets, Dad!

The very next night I was out to celebrate my birthday with a bunch of the girls from work.  The wonderful Anne went to the trouble of making me a quite splendid cake, which you can see pictured below –

Birthday Cake

Anne the cake-maker is sadly leaving us next month, which is a devastating blow professionally.  Though, I suppose it is a lucky escape for me, as the cake I feel I would be obliged to make for her birthday next year would likely get me the jail….
And so, anyway, it transpired I spent the first few days after my birthday eating jam sponge breasts.  And it is not every year I can say that!  The girls from work  ensured I celebrated my birthday in fine style, plying me with booze and making me dance to Robbie Williams.  I love every single one of them, even if they did make me dance to Robbie bloody Williams.  They helped make an old man very happy 😀

Here’s to 50!  Bring it on!

I shall leave you with Jericho, a song that I dedicate to you know who 😉

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Dear God #1.

(I shall be 40 on the 23rd of this month.  On the same night Rufus Wainwright is playing in Bristol.  I found out today that the tickets are sold out.  Which inspired this post….)

Dear God,

I don’t know who You are.  I don’t know what You want.  If You are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don’t have money.  But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career.  Skills that make me a nightmare for people like You.  If You get me tickets for the Rufus gig in Bristol on the 23rd, that’ll be the end of it.  I will not look for You, I will not pursue You.  But if You don’t, I will look for You, I will find You, and I will fucking kill You.

Beautiful Things #1.

I have decided to start taking more notice of the beautiful things in life.  One of the most beautiful things I have seen this past week has been this short video.  (now a working link)

Everton tribute to the 96 who died at Hillsborough by emmysguysandgals

Beauty can come from the most ugly of things.  What happened at Hillsborough 23 years ago was an ugly thing.  The lies told about it were ugly, and the truth revealed this past week is rather ugly too.  But this tribute by Everton FC to the campaign for truth and justice by the families of the 96 dead Liverpool supporters is both beautiful and quite moving.  It brought a lump to my throat anyway.  Despite everything, never forget that  there is real goddam human decency out there, even in football.

http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/football/news-and-comment/hillsborough–police-did-doctor-evidence-in-bid-to-avoid-blame-8126233.html

http://www.thestar.co.uk/sport/football/make-hillsborough-disaster-s-guilty-parties-pay-liverpool-captain-1-4954267

Good Old Bob Marley….

I came across a quote by Bob Marley the other day which read –

“If she’s amazing, she won’t be easy.  If she’s easy, she won’t be amazing.  If she’s worth it, you won’t give up.  If you give up, you’re not worthy. … Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.”

For too long now I have been berating myself over the failures of my love life.  But no more.  All I have to do is change the ‘she’ to a ‘he’ in that Marley quote and I see things a little bit differently –

If he’s amazing, he won’t be easy.  If he’s easy, he won’t be amazing.  If he’s worth it, you won’t give up.  If you give up, you’re not worthy. … Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.

I forget sometimes that I am a worthwhile human being too.  From now on the only ones I will ‘suffer for’ are the ones that ‘won’t give up’.  Instead of feeling sorry for myself, I’m now starting to feel sorry for those who missed out on me.  😀  Funny how a wee quote can change yer mindset…..

 

The Man In Me, Bob Dylan.

Today’s song is The Man in Me, by Bob Dylan.  Enjoy.

 

 

Bob Dylan The Man In Me Lyrics

The man in me will do nearly any task
As for compensation, there’s a little he will ask
Take a woman like you
To get through to the man in me.

Storm clouds are raging all around my door
I think to myself I might not take it anymore
Take a woman like your kind
To find the man in me.

But, oh what a wonderful feeling
Just to know that you are near
It sets my heart a-reeling
From my toes up to my ears.

The man in me will hide sometimes to keep from being seen
But that’s just because he doesn’t want to turn into some machine
Take a woman like you
To get through to the man in me.